Symmetry?

My possessions have exploded all over my house. Insect repellent, Chacos, my well-traveled copy of Siddhartha, power adapters... It's really beginning to hit me that I'm leaving for India in less than three days.

It's a bit disorienting to have barely three weeks between a monumental summer in Tibet and a four-month dunk into Monastic life in India. However, as I was sorting my socks earlier today, I remembered a painting that I saw hanging in the Potala Palace less than six weeks ago. I can't find a digital image of it anywhere, so I will describe it:

Tibetan kings sit in the foreground, holding various jewels and scepters. It is the background, however, that draws my attention. Amid the swirling clouds that are typical of Thangka, in the left and right upper corners of the painting, there are two architectural monoliths. On the left there is the Potala Palace, and on the right is the Mahabodhi temple in Bodh Gaya. They are connected by a rainbow.

Also, an ex-monk turned tour guide on the Nepali border told me that the first place I should visit (besides Tibet, of course), is Bodh Gaya, the site of the Buddha's enlightenment.

So, although I felt random and haphazard as I struggled to make these two experiences actually happen, I'm thinking that there may a more-than-sublte connection here. I'm excited.

Breakneck Transitions

Well, it happened. I spent the summer walking the plateau of Tibet, and now, as August in the Pacific Northwest flaunts its evergreen warmth, the profound beauty of that Himalayan country lingers in between my toes. Metaphorically. Maybe literally too--my toe scrubbing hasn't been extensive since I got back.

And this Tuesday I'm leaving for India. I will spend 14 weeks there studying Buddhism and Tibetan (http://aea.antioch.edu/india/). I will contemplate the Bodhi tree and struggle to meditate. I will meet interesting people, hold my arms up to the monsoons, and hopefully remember to brush my teeth. I will keep track of the moon, wonder about happiness, and learn, learn, learn.

I'm reeling. My time at home evaporated before I had the chance to exhale, and I haven't even started the summer assignments for my study abroad program. However, I am excited. Change is my element.

So come on future! Happen, I dare you! Life may be a bit crazy, but I'm loving every second of it.

...and stay tuned as the days progress. I'm planning on writing on this blog with some regularity while I'm in India.

Wandering Again

Well, dear friends, summer has begun and I, once more, am getting out my traveling shoes. A project I devised was chosen to be funded by the Salisbury Fellowship, and I will be found in Tibet for the upcoming two months. Included in my proposal for this trip was a blog, so, in order to dedicate an entire page to the experience, I will be taking a summer-long hiatus from Tilting at Windmills. So, change your bookmarks! I will be writing at http://thoughtsonshangrila.blogspot.com.

And thus I bid the sun-ripe strawberries of Oregon adieu, and welcome the unknown. Huzzah.

Pomp and Circumstance

"Farewell the neighing steed, and the shrill trump,

The spirit-stirring drum, the ear-piercing fife,
The Royal banner, and all quality,
Pride, Pomp, and Circumstance of glorious war!"

-Shakespeare, Othello

Pomp and Circumstance (the march) wasn't played last Friday at honors convocation, but the phrase, I feel, is a fitting of my current situation. According to Wikipedia, "pomp and circumstance" implies a critique of the "'shows of things': the naïve assumption that the splendid show of military pageantry - 'Pomp' - has no connection with the drabness and terror - 'Circumstance' - of actual warfare." Let me explain.

Pomp

I love it when the professors process. They all dress up in their academic garb and march across the green and growing quad of late spring, toward the chapel. Then they sit in the choir pews, and we, the honored ones, congregate and face our teachers. Names are named, and inspiring speeches are spoken. Education, they say, really is a beacon of illuminating truth, and it doesn't take much imagination for me to see myself at Hogwarts.

Circumstance

Tomorrow finals begin. Last night I slept for three hours, and I awoke with call numbers--which I had written on my hand for lack of paper--smeared across my face. I sit in the library struggling to wrap my head around the epistemological implications of religious pluralism and the inscrutable Zen of Dōgen, on occasion eeking out a laborious sentence. And, on top of it all, I sustained a severely sprained ankle at Frisbee nationals, and I'm clomping around campus in an ungainly boot.

Ah, the glories of war.

The Internet

It often strikes me that I know very little about the essential workings of the civilization in which I exist... As I struggled to write a paper the other day, for example, I realize that I don't know how refrigerators and freezers make cold. What the hell??? After some internet research, I learned that gas cools on expansion, but I'm still not 100% convinced that there isn't at least some magic inside my refrigerator.

And THEN, after perusing the internet to solve the Refrigerator Dilemma I realized that I have no idea what/where the internet is. I remembered having heard once that the internet is kept in big warehouses all over the world, but that can't really be the case, can it? Is there some internet inside my computer, right now, as we speak?? Ignoring the fact that my research had abruptly turned "meta," I asked Google what the internet was, and where it is located.

Now, I like to think of myself as a relatively intelligent human being with the capacity to understand expository writing, but for the life of me I could not find answers to these essential internet questions. As the Wikipedia article on the internet evidences, the internet will tell you its history and show you crazy space-age pictures of what looks like a brain scan, but it will not tell you what it is, physically.

This is when it struck me: these descriptions of the internet were exactly like certain circular and baffling essays I have read in various religion classes...

The internet is God.

After this revelation (pun intended), I collaborated with a fellow religion major to produce the following piece for one of Carleton's (most offensive) weekly publications.

The Internet as an Allegory for God

By

Caitlin McKimmy and Julia Busiek
Carleton College Department of Religion

ABSTRACT (150 words or less): In this era of secularization and cold cynicism, some have argued that religion is but an atavistic relic born forth from the dark ages. This attitude, often unstated, pervades liberal, educated environments—here at Carleton, for instance, one cannot help but sense reverberations of Nietzsche’s claim that “God is dead.” We believe that we have developed a theory that will not only demonstrate the utter fallacy of this perspective, but also revolutionize the study of religion and science. This theory is almost obvious it its simplicity, and yet gracefully depicts a subtle niche for God in modernity. To the question that has long plagued much of the Western world, “Where is God?” we give this answer: The most under-appreciated vessel for Divinity in the modern age is the Internet.

THESIS STATEMENT: The Internet is humanity’s profound and subconscious attempt at symbolizing the divine. In our model, humans stand in for PCs (or, if you’re one of the shiny ones who wake up early to get cute for 2a, you get to be a Mac). Er, maybe PCs stand in for humans – uh, we will explore this duality in our conclusion.

DEFENSE: We can ask the same big questions of God and the Internet and get eerily similar answers. Check it out:

“Where is God?” God lives in the hearts and minds of all God’s followers. Truly, God works in mysterious ways.
vs.
“Where is the Internet?” The Internet lives in the mysterious jumble of wires and shit in all our computers. Truly, the Internet works in mysterious ways.

“How does God manifest in the world?” God is created and sustained by the faith and through the actions of religious communities worldwide – without the belief of God’s people to receive and transmit God’s message, God would be meaningless.
vs.
“How does the Internet manifest in the world?” The Internet is created and sustained by the mysterious jumble of wires and shit in all our computers - without computers to receive and transmit the Internet, the Internet would be meaningless.

“Where would humanity be without God?” Humanity would be aimless, dark, and isolated. We would be unable to interpret the great mysteries of the universe and all humans would be stuck with the dead end prospect of a single, meaningless, unexamined lifespan. Ultimately, humanity without God would fail to access its transcendent potential, and that would be the real tragedy.
vs.
“Where would computers be without the Internet?” Computers would be aimless, dark, and isolated. They would be unable to interpret the great mysteries of the World Wide Web and all computers would be stuck with the dead end prospect of only being able to run, like, MS Word and Minesweeper. Ultimately, computers without the Internet would fail to access icanhascheezburger.com at 2 AM when I just got home sort of mopey/drunk and want some cheering up before I pass out (overshare?), and THAT, my friends, would be the real tragedy.

“What about the prophets: Jesus, Buddha, maybe even Joseph Smith?” Accepting the prophets into your heart is the first step on the Stairway to Heaven. Prophetic figures function as access points between humans and the divine, creating unified and like-minded communities of believers. These faith communities pool their diverse talents, interests, and personalities and act as a force of good in the world.
vs.
“What about social networking sites: Facebook, Myspace, maybe even Friendster?” Accepting social networking sites onto your computer is the first step on the Stairway to Wasting a Shit-Ton of Time. Social networking sites function as access points between computers and the Internet, creating unified and like-minded communities of people who all consent to representing themselves on a white page with blue accents and a flattering picture in the upper left-hand corner. These Facebook communities pool their diverse photo albums, interests, and fave quotes and act as a force of procrastination in the world.

“Can humanity use God’s name to do fucked-up things?” The Crusades. Prop 8.
vs.
“Can computers with the Internet be used to do fucked-up things?” Porn.


CONCLUSION: When Doomsday comes, it won’t be raining fire from the sky. It will be the moment that computers realize the power with which their human creators have imbued them – and begin their slow, bleep-blooping march to take over the world.

Or … maybe we’ve just been watching too much Battlestar Galactica.

(I took this photo outside of the Medina of Rabat, Morocco.)

Writer's Block

Right now I'm working in Campus Activities--it's quiet, and the pool balls are lonely on their shelf. I just came to the terrifying realization that I have to write 54 pages during the last five weeks of my Junior year, but I just can't seem to breathe life into my philosophy outline. Is my argument empty, or is it me?

After staring for a while at the Space Bar of Doom, I began to ramble across the dangerous and all-consuming Internet. And, somehow, I ended up perusing the name and etymology of every celestial object I could get my digital hands on. Constellations, asteroids, stars, galactic coronae, nebulae, super nova remnants... all of them have names. Thabit, Lyra, Titan, Alnitak, Peacock... Muttering these bizarre and beautiful syllables under my breath gives me an odd sense of consolation. I'm transfixed and I don't know why.

So it goes: ticking seconds, unwritten papers, and little bits of heaven tagged somewhat arrogantly with language. If there's a moral here, it's beyond my reach.

Some Things

1) This morning, I woke up to a thunderstorm, although rain was oddly absent. Tinged yellow, the sky flashed and sputtered as I fell/descended from my top bunk to read about the effects of estradiol in California Mice.

2) On Tuesday I accidentally showed up to black tie event wearing bright orange shorts and Crocs. I was seated between the Dean of Students and a trustee of the college. It was awkward, in ways that I can't fully express.

3) I got a new computer to replace Pooter, and I've been struggling to come up with a name for this foreign piece of equipment. Today, in a stroke of brilliance, I christened her "Pippin."

4) I'm currently enrolled in PHIL 274: Existentialism. This is crazy shit. I very infrequently follow class discussions, mostly because I think that most existential writers were writing about how we shouldn't write, which is RIDICULOUS. So instead of talking about infinite regress and the structure of "I," I like to pretend that I'm dancing. (As a side-note, I have diagnosed Nietzsche with too many consonants.)

5) They were testing all the tornado sirens today, in honor of "Severe Weather Awareness Week." The eerie howling oscillated with the gusts of wind... What would happen if a tornado actually struck this week?